8gurl’s Neighborhood

:)

 

More about it here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

in a book at a used bookstore.

If tears could build a stairway,

and memories were a lane,

I would walk right up to heaven.

To bring you home again,

No farewell words were spoken

No time to say goodbye,

You were gone before I knew it,

and only God knows why.

My heart still aches with sadness

 and secret tears still flow,

what it meant to love you.

No one will ever know.

I thought this little poem was sweet.

So I have been divorced for 2-1/2 years and as many divorces it was a nasty one. I kept on moving forward in life I have taken the time to get to know myself and in the process found out I am a pretty cool person with a good heart and now someone who looks after themself.

I chose not to have any contact with my ex much to his surprise and it had irked him he had tried all different routes to keep track of me. He began to work in my industry, tried to keep touch with family members, tried to track me down in San Diego, etc....

But I always wondered if I had truly healed from the wounds inflicted from the demise of our marriage and the actual divorce. In the oddest times I will have dream after dream of me still being stuck in the relationship and trying to explain to him that we were divorced and him saying we are not and knowing I have to go through the process all over again. Typically I will have 3 or 4 dreams like that followed up by finding out through friends or family telling me that he is trying to contact me.

So recently I have been having the same old dreams but the last dream I told him we are divroced and you just need to deal with it. Well sure enough he has been trying to get in contact with me. My Mom called me this morning letting me know that he had sent a youtube video of him proposing to a woman at a concert to a couple of my cousins. So the e-mail circulated through my family and my Mom called me to tell me what was going on.

My reaction...not much of one. I remember when my friend Tif had found out her ex husband was engaged...she was so upset by it called me in tears. Me I am more concerned that he felt the need for me to know. But the thing is there is nothing in the 8 years of marriage that I want back...nothing. So I have confirmation that yes I am over that part of my life and I have healed quite a bit since then. I am  a better person for it. I feel such a sense of relief.

DeWitte's outside changing the radiator on his truck. It was leaking and when he went to see what the problem was, he touched it and it disintegrated all over the ground. Ok..it didn't do that but it was all rusty so he's changing it. He's so handy to have around the house! He can fix our cars, do all our electrical work and plumbing. I haven't ever seen him back away from any task that needs to be done. Plus he's got Nathan out there "helping" so he'll need to be extra patient.

Super smart, incredibly patient and extraordinarily handy...Damn, that's sexy! I think I'll make him an extra special dinner tonight..I'm even gonna make dessert. I never make dessert. I can't eat it so why make it.

Speaking of dessert...how come nobody ever told me about Pavlova? My eggs are coming up to room temperature as we speak. I'm gonna learn how to make this dessert just to impress people when they come over for dinner.

I was having a discussion with my friends from London a while back about film credits, and how it seemed silly to me that people would argue over where their names came in a credit sequence. It makes sense to let the audience know up front who they’ll be watching (unless it’s a surprise twist ending appearance, or such like), but other than that I don’t see why it matters where everyone is placed. It was explained to me that credits are currency in the showbusiness world, and that failing to fight for your credit would be like leaving your bank card and pin number lying around, where any random visitor to your house could nick it. So, I couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for the actress Emma Pierson, when I picked up a DVD copy of the ITV Drama Bloodlines.

 

Pierson is undoubtedly the star of the show... and I’m not saying that in a patronising, “look at her boobs” sort of way... I mean she plays the central protagonist, has the hardest work to do emotionally, and scores about 70% of the screen-time. It’s undeniably her spotlight, and she works it like a mother trucker. But the DVD cover features fleeting co-star Max Beesley alongside her, as if it’s a 50/50 buddy cop thing. The US version is even worse, with Beesley taking pole position, as Pierson is consigned to a faint ghostly presence at his shoulder, suggesting that she’s nothing more than a concerned girlfriend or phantom side-chick. In fact, it’s Pierson’s character who bears the brunt of the detective work, while all Beesely gives her is one useful clue, and a shoulder to cry on! Interestingly, the US cover drops his name entirely, in favour of Kevin McNally, who is more recognisable to international audiences as Captain Jack Sparrow’s trusty first mate Gibbs in the Pirates of the Caribbean films. He plays Pierson’s father, and it’s the relationship between them, and the doubt over his guilt for various crimes, which sets the story in motion... so fair enough.

 

I know these things shouldn’t annoy me, but they do... it probably isn’t even a feminist issue... but if someone is doing 70% of the work, they should get an equivalent amount of the credit, right? Regardless of previous roles, or how much “heat” they have, in marketing terms.